1. You’ve wept over a book in a very public place. It’s okay. We understand. Sometimes you can’t help it when you’re smacked in the face by a particularly moving passage. Although, pro-tip: do not read the end of The Book Thief in public. So many tears, so many concerned strangers.
2. You’ve smelled your books. Some days you just want to crack open an old book and inhale that heavenly combination of paper and ink.
3. You’ve sprawled out in a very uncomfortable-looking pose to read. It’s a scientific fact that the most comfortable reading positions look absolutely ridiculous to non-readers. Whatever. You know that hanging off an armchair with your legs hooked over the back is an ideal reading spot.
4. You’ve just sat and stared at your books. You gaze at their simple beauty, recalling fond memories and fantasizing about the stories you haven’t yet read. It’s calming and wonderful, but if anyone were to walk in on you, you’d probably look like a forgotten character from The Shining.
5. Your facial expressions have matched whatever’s happening in the scene you’re reading. Sad scene? Your face will range from bawling your eyes out to looking moderately empathetic. The real problem comes when your characters are in the middle of a heated argument and to outsiders you look like you’re about to murder your book.
6. You’ve purchased a book to give to a friend… and then kept it yourself. It’s really not that big of a deal. You really wanted to read it, and it’s just sitting there. Plus, your friend doesn’t even know you got it for them! It’s the perfect crime.
7. You’ve gone multiple days without showering because you were too busy reading. It’s fine, really. You were on vacation, never left the house… literally no one knew. Plus, showering after finishing a particularly good book and pondering Life is one of the best things ever.
8. You’ve found yourself getting all hot and bothered by porn. Bookshelf Porn, that is.
9. You’ve thrown a book and then apologized profusely to it. You’re not proud of it, but sometimes your emotions get the best of you and you toss a book to the ground when something ridiculous happens. However, immediately after the precious book leaves your hands, the world moves in slow motion, and you watch in horror as it drops to the floor. You race to pick it back up, assess for injuries, and apologize, because it’s not the book’s fault the characters are acting irrationally.
10. You’ve gotten into heated arguments with friends over fictional love triangles. Katniss and Peeta 5ever. Anyone who says otherwise can go volunteer for the Hunger Games.
11. You’ve fallen asleep clutching your book. It usually happens when you’re in the middle of a chapter and decide to close your eyes for just a quick second. The next morning, you wake up with your finger still tucked in the book marking your place, because even your sleeping body knows that it desperately does not want to lose its spot.
12. You’ve packed for a trip, and realized that your suitcase was 60% clothes and 40% books to read. Did you also pack a Kindle? Possibly. There are just so many things you want to read, and you can’t pick just one!
13. You’ve walked into trees, light poles, etc while attempting to read while walking. You don’t think anyone saw, but you can never be too sure… oh well. Read on.
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