Even if you’re just talking about it, whatever it may be. Your mind is igniting some kind of attraction in them, and not just your body.
The kind that keep you up all night talking to them. The pleasure you both receive from conversation is almost as great as the satisfaction you receive from being with them physically. You aren’t afraid to be deep. You could talk about the most abstract things that would seem absurd to anyone else, but you both don’t care because you feel something with them that you don’t feel physically with someone else.
And they call or text you when you are. The middle of the day when your mind is wandering from whatever task you’re supposed to be doing, and you think about that corny joke they told you two days ago, and then suddenly your phone lights up, and it is them calling to see how your day is going. It’s not some weird telepathy that either of you have, it’s the fact that you both are thinking of each other.
You feel like you can say what’s on your mind because they’ll somehow understand. Even if you don’t necessarily understand yourself, they add something to your thoughts that helps you figure it out. You’re open with them because they help you when you are.
When you aren’t being open, they know. They make it extremely hard for you to keep your guard up. Whether you’re scared of being hurt or you’re scared of the connection you know is clearly there, you can’t run forever. When someone brings your guard down, generally there isn’t physical motivation behind it. They do it unintentionally. It just happens.
You don’t explore their interests to get them into bed with you. You explore their interests because you want to get a better understanding of who they are, and potentially share an experience. You want to be with them when they are embedded in excitement, whether it’s their favorite band, sports team, or art venue, a connection occurs when you see them in that element.
Sometimes they add a new perspective that you otherwise wouldn’t see from. When you’re extremely angry about the terrible day you had at work, or the ridiculous argument your mother hashed out when she called you, this person views the situation from a different angle, and they help you to view it from that angle too. Their opinions aren’t better than yours, they’re just different.
They make you do things that you probably wouldn’t do with anyone else. They are the motivation behind your spontaneity. If you were with someone you only connected with physically, you wouldn’t walk to the park you’ve never been to at midnight just to lay in the grass and look at the sky. You do these things because the experience is better when you’re with them. Even if it’s something that wouldn’t otherwise intrigue you, the person makes it special, and your connection makes it even better.
When they’re only connected to you physically, they will generally only do things that are convenient for them. Every moment will be on their time, and their agenda, and you just sort of go along with it. When the connection is deeper than that, they do things for you to be with you. They will come to you, they won’t always make you come to them. If the connection is real, the effort will be real as well.
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